maanantai 24. tammikuuta 2011

trying to lose weight the healthy way? I promised my boyfriend I would try it for a week or two. I will let you know how it goes. I have been to the gym every day except today (6 out of 7 days this week) and I have been eating around 1000 cals per day. More this weekend tho because my bf is a jerk and makes me eat everything that he does. Or at least, it feels that way. I don't think he actually says those words out loud, but its implied. DAMN.

I'll let you know if I lost. Weighing tomorrow morning.

torstai 20. tammikuuta 2011

weighed myself. promptly sunk into deep depression.

things have been crazy at work, it's nice being busy.

i feel like i'm not good enough. never good enough. not even to randomly post on here with people who are successful and who are attaining their dreams. i am nothing. nobody. you should probably stop reading my blog altogether.

watching supersize vs superskinny distracts me from my own eating problems. whatever they are. the obvious triggers in the show are over-ridden by watching the supersize person in their skivvies. makes me want to reject food forever. if only.

tiistai 11. tammikuuta 2011

working hard! it's my boyfriends birthday this weekend, so shit is going to go down. Need to up my exercise so I can eat a little and look normal! good luck everyone - this is our year!

torstai 6. tammikuuta 2011

Actually feel better today! Thank goodness.  Had a bowl of special k this morning. Trying to stay strong, its so twisted that when i'm happy, I don't mind eating, but when I'm lonely and insecure, I hate food. Being with my boyfriend makes me happy, so I always eat more with him than when he's away. So sad.

tiistai 4. tammikuuta 2011

oh god. the holidays have killed me. I am soooo sick its unbelievable. So I lie in bed all day. I have been eating more than I would care to admit, but not more than 1000 per day at least. hopefully this cold has been using up energy, meaning I won't gain weight. fingers crossed!

Happy New Year everyone. Let's get everything we want this year.